Preserving the Memories of our Veterans, One Headstone at a Time

When Tara Haag entered Vaughn Bay Cemetery in late September, it wasn’t just for a visit. It was a mission. As the owner of Headstoners, a Port Orchard-based grave tending service, Haag has spent the past three years scraping away decades of dirt, moss and mold from thousands of gravestones. But what makes Haag’s work truly remarkable isn’t just her dedication to her craft — it’s her commitment to honoring military veterans.

Although Headstoners offers its skills to anyone in need, Haag reserves special attention for the headstones of veterans, which often bear the brunt of time’s neglect. It’s a labor of love she offers to those who served, at no charge.

“Veterans have sacrificed so much, and if there was ever a group of people whose monuments should be cared for, it’s theirs,” Haag said as she and her sister and co-worker, Caleh Chumley, set up their equipment at Vaughn Bay.

“It’s a way of preserving history and helping ensure their contributions aren’t forgotten.”

Haag’s passion for cemetery restoration began long before she picked up her first brush. Growing up in Colorado, she and her sister were often dragged to historic cemeteries by their parents, who wanted to teach them about local history. While many would see this as an eerie experience, the sisters saw it differently.

“We’d walk around pioneer cemeteries in these old mining towns, and I’d see all these headstones in disrepair,” Haag said. “I always thought, ‘Someone should be taking care of these.’ ”

That someone ended up being Haag herself.

In 2021, amid the isolation of the COVID-19 pandemic, she started Headstoners with a mission to restore dignity to neglected gravestones. Chumley joined a year later, trading in a hairstylist career disrupted by the pandemic for the surprising solace of cemetery work. Together, they travel from site to site, armed with buckets, brushes, and a highly specialized cleaning solution called D2, scrubbing away the dirt, grime and slime that time has left behind. The two recently cleaned more than 60 headstones during the Burley Cemetery restoration over the summer.

On a chilly fall day at Vaughn Bay Cemetery, Haag and Chumley cleaned three Civil War veterans’ graves: Corporal Matthew Bliss of the 7th Massachusetts Infantry, Lieutenant John Hamell Deal of the 114th Pennsylvania Infantry, and Second Lieutenant Alfred Van Slyke of the 151st Indiana Infantry. Standing over Van Slyke’s headstone, Haag pointed out the black mold creeping across the top. “No amount of scrubbing will get rid of that on its own,” she explained.

“But in a few months, the D2 will seep into the stone and gently break down the biological growth without damaging the stone. It’ll look new again.”

It’s meticulous, back-bending work, but Haag and Chumley are determined to do it right. They never use harsh chemicals or abrasive tools, and every cleaning is documented with before-and-after photos for families who may live too far away to tend their loved ones’ graves.

What began as a small gesture has grown into a community movement. “A few years ago, I wondered how many veteran headstones I could get cleaned before Veterans Day. I set a goal of 25,” Haag said. “But then I put out a call to people in Port Orchard asking if anyone wanted to volunteer, and we ended up cleaning 150 veterans’ headstones in just a few weeks.” Haag pointed out she must get permission from the families or the cemetery before she’ll clean any headstone.

Since then, Haag estimated she’s cleaned around 500 veteran headstones. But it’s not just about the numbers. Each time she scrubs away the grime from a stone’s surface, Haag makes a point to learn more about the person it commemorates. “I’ll look them up on the Find a Grave app,” she said. “Sometimes there’s not a lot of information, but it helps me feel a deeper connection to what I’m doing.”

Haag isn’t just offering a service; she’s passing on knowledge. She hosts community events a few times a year where she teaches kids and groups how to properly clean headstones. “There’s plenty of work to go around,” she said. “I don’t want to keep this to myself. Families move away and, eventually, there’s no one left to care for these graves, so if I can teach someone to do it right, fewer stones will fall into disrepair. We should continue to honor vets by making sure their final resting places are well-cared for.”

For some, it’s just a practical lesson in maintenance. For others, it’s a chance to confront a subject many avoid: mortality.

“One mom was so grateful,” Chumley recalled. “She said this helped her start a conversation with her son about death. We tend to ignore it, and then we’re devastated when it happens. But caring for these headstones is a reminder that we’re all part of a much larger story.”

It’s a story Haag and Chumley hope to keep telling, one stone at a time. As Veterans Day approaches, they’ll be out in the cemeteries restoring dignity to the fallen and ensuring each story is preserved for generations to come. For this sister duo, it’s a promise that these sacrifices will never be forgotten.