To the Class of 2026: Now Fear This

It is common in every child’s life to be constantly faced with the question “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Let me tell you, that is such a big question to ask a 6-year-old, and even more so at the ripe old age of 18.

If you asked me that when I was in elementary school, I might have said, “I want to be a firefighter, so that I can be just like my mom.” But I also distinctly remember wanting to be a National Geographic photographer and to travel the world. Up until middle school, my answer would change weekly.

Then one day I decided I wanted to be a music teacher, and that dream has stayed consistent since then.

Although my reasoning for my passion has shifted over time, I have been chasing down that dream for about eight years now.

I have completed my third year at Washington State University, slowly working toward my music education degree and future career in the music classroom. And let me tell you, I am scared.

This could perhaps be some uncommon variant of “senioritis.” However, I face the same thoughts every day, questioning whether I am good enough or have the potential to be a good teacher.

But what does it even mean to be a good teacher? Or how will I ever know if I am truly “good enough?” I suppose that turns into more of a philosophical discussion, one’s views on personal value, and even the journey of life.

I believe that we were all smacked down on this Earth to complete some sort of journey. And throughout the part that takes us through school, we read many coming-of-age novels. The English teacher’s personal favorite seemed always to be some “hero’s journey,” where the main character must leave the life they know, face various trials, ultimately undergo a major transformation, and return home a new person, a “hero.” This sounds vaguely familiar to my college experience.

“What do you want to be when you grow up?” But first, go through 12 years of school while we prepare you, mostly, and then shove you into the deep end of a pool with your wrists and ankles tied together. “Congratulations, you graduated high school, welcome to the real world!”

I can’t tell whether or not I was adequately prepared during my long time serving in the Peninsula School District. I struggle with the concept of “personal value” and question whether or not I will be a good teacher almost every day. But I suppose that circles back to the topic of preparation in the school system and the journey of personal growth.

Perhaps, you, dear reader, as a graduated senior on whatever path you’re following, hear those same inner voices of self-doubt and angst. I find they are always present, but that they tend to grow with me, as perhaps they will for you as you evolve and flourish into who you are intended to become.

It is so easy to just say “Oh, you can’t listen to your fears,” because it’s like telling a child there are no monsters under the bed. But the underlying fear that something is out to get you is always present, and creating new monsters of self-doubt.

The truth is, there are monsters under the bed, and they are secretly trying to help you.

You must allow the monsters to push you to your fullest potential. Listen to them say “You will fail in the classroom,” or “You’re not a good enough musician to teach children,” and use it as fuel to prove the voices and the bad thoughts wrong. You’ll be surprised and pleased when they change.

Grace Nesbit begins her senior year at WSU this month. She grew up in Lakebay and attended Evergreen Elementary, Key Peninsula Middle School, and Peninsula High School.